Nobody but me could write these notes.
I think for a moment and realize – there is no merit in this. Actually, the world has proven me – throughout thirty four years – that, in this society, merit is but a sordid fiction.
I know about hunger; because I have felt it running through my veins – that which people from here have learned it is called hunger. I have known/I know the empty hole that passes swallowing the edges of a desire that is not born in the mind and that needs food, so strong is that desire.
To know about hunger is also to know about that which people from here have learned to call desire.
Every animal has survival instincts, so intense is the connection between life and itself/of life with life.
Every plant grown towards the sun, stretching itself through life on search of food, climbing on walls of apartments and hills or resting frenetically at the dark bottom of the oceans trying to synthesize some light, so intense are the chemistry, the physics and the math that unwrap/unpack inside the cells of our desire to live.
The more hunger screams, with its huge wide open[arreganhada] mouth in our stomachs, the more desire becomes clear[escancara], searching for some light to grab with its red fingernails.
What hunger is this? The calango-man[as vezes se coloca asterisco com explicação do termo tipo “nota do tradutor”] that filmed the dried up pains of country people[não conheço equivalente] said that the worthy/true [digna] look of hunger is violence.
I don’t think violence is the word to describe/name it. The worthy/true look has the face of a Mapinguari[nota da wiki: the name is usually translated as “the roaring animal” or “the fetid beast”/ou pode colocar asterisco tbm]. It opens its huge mouth, inscribed inside/in the middle of the stomach, and roars/screams[vocifera] the sound of the hunter it devours; it is not afraid of any hunter, it only fears laziness, indomitable, resting in the wisdom of old shamans that have transformed into forest, defending it from humans/men.
Hunger is human.
Hunger is a plague that men have created against other men and woman. It is also what moves the wrath of the Mapinguari that desires to live. That desires nature’s desire without narrative, that is living.
To know about hunger is to know also about desire.
I have this knowledge, so popular in the lowlands and so rare in social science’s circles that studies us to understand how other “races” behave in the face of chaos and hope – “are they apathetic or revolutionary?”. Ask themselves the economists, the political scientists, the literati and all the illuminist strand. “Will they be integrated to the vertiginous rhythm of the forces of production/productive forces, replaced by artificial intelligence or will the revert time, rehabilitating shamanic technologies?”. Ask themselves engineers and physicists, as well as anthropologists and cosmopoliticians/cosmopolitics.
This is not a book, this is a diary. A collection of facts and thoughts, an ethnography from hunger, with hunger,